Investing in Relationships for Growth

if you lack: money, time, or flexibility

Most people want to build deeper more meaningful relationships. We have friendships, other trail blazers in our field, and people in our tribe that we want to connect with. Those relationships help us become the best version of ourselves. They inspire us, ground us, and encourage. But each season in life brings its own challenges.

This last week personal finance geeks flocked to San Diego to be part of FinCon. Hundreds of like mind folks getting to meet their online friends, have great conversations, and learn from each other.

I had to stay home.

My sweet baby is still breastfeeding. Despite much metal maneuvering, I just couldn’t quite wrap my mind around how this would work. There were so many people I wanted to chat with, hug or have a drink with.

Maybe we would love to take a road trip with our best friend. Meet up with the like-minded folks in our tribe. Or get together with our old college friends.


We are paying off debt. We are saving to buy a house. We are busting our butt for that promotion. We had a kid, or two, or holy crap 5!

We can be paralyzed by the curse of the perfect dream. If I can’t be perfect, then we do nothing.

There can be middle ground. Maybe I can’t jet away to Iceland for a week with my BFF. But there are things we can do, while we are in the challenging seasons of life.


Find something to connect about.

My friend recently did a sugar detox along with her parents and brother. She said it ignited a storm of conversation. All of a sudden they are texting pictures of what they made for dinner, sharing recipes, celebrating how great they feel. It provided an opportunity to connect. Text messages, short phone calls, sending pictures, and little Fb chats starting abounding and they felt more connected than they had in a long time.

You could do a book club where you text your thoughts. Everyone reads a chapter a week (or month if life is that crazy) and you can text each other as you go.

Do an online course with your friends. Maybe you can’t escape for a conference or retreat, but you could find a few friends to do a course alongside. You will learn and grow together. You might live in different parts of the world, but you can share this experience.

Maybe try a challenge with your group: decluttering, saving, shopping ban.

I once hosted a 30 day green smoothie detox with about 50 friends. I sent little emails every day and we all chatted about it in a Facebook group. The interaction and comradery was amazing! That was 6 years ago, and people still mention it to me.

Just because we can’t take an expensive week long trip, shouldn’t prevent us from connecting and having fun with our tribe.

Skype Cocktail Party

I head a speaker mention that he sets up 3-4 skype dates a week to connect with people from his industry. I felt like Jeff Dunhams crazy puppet waving his hand in front of his face. I was floored. That literally had NEVER occurred to me! I have used Skype to open birthday gifts sent to my kids, or on Christmas day with family. That’s about it.

Instead of feeling sad over missing FinCon, what if I hosted a Skype cocktail party?

Over two hours I am setting up 10 minute windows for a meet and greet. For all the introverts (Hello!), there will be 3 starter questions. It might not be quite as epic as drinks in the hotel bar, but you can BYO and save some serious cash!

Do you have 3 or 4 friends across your industry? I know a few people who make jewelry just in my little town. What if you hosted a Skype group call? Why pay to be part of a master mind group when you can create your own for free? Pick one topic for a 45-60 minute call. Share ideas, encourage, problem solve.

Do you know a few other friends trying to pay down debt or save for a big goal? What if you had a group call once a month? Or start a FB group to share tips?

I love conferences. I love big trips. I love the epic weekend getaways with friends. In between those mountain top experiences, we can still invest in our relationships in a way that requires less time, money and flexibility.

It will take a bit of coordination for Mr. Mt to wrangle the 5 kids for 2 hours, but it’s a heck of a lot easier for him than 5 days solo!

Instead of drowning in the FOMO, let’s leverage technology to foster that connect which brings us closer to our goals.

I’m hosting two dates in October for my Skype meet and greet cocktail hour!

One for other PF bloggers and one for my readers!

If you want the details, sign up for emails and I will get that sent out to you Wednesday! (For all my readers who have stuck with my super lame emails up to this point: THANK YOU! I am going to figure this out and make them awesome! Starting with inviting you to my Skype meet and greet.)

For the serious introverts who want to know the questions before they even commit to seeing an email, here you go:

Bloggers (In 10 minutes)

  1. 1 funny story about you.
  2. Why did you started blogging?
  3. What is 1 thing you are doing to drive traffic right now?

And if you are already making sure your hair is brushed for these 10 minutes, why not invite other bloggers to skype with you after we chat? Did you miss out on FinCon too? Or maybe failed to connect with someone you were hoping to meet? If I am going to be wearing lip gloss, this isn’t to be wasted!

Readers (10 minutes)

  1. What is your main money focus right now?
  2. One area that you are killing it, and one that is a work in progress.
  3. What is your favorite fall beverage?

There you go! I’m super excited to see your cute mugs and get to know you all better! I only have 8 spots for each group, so make sure you sign up ASAP after you see the email.

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Please note: I reserve the right to delete comments that are offensive or off-topic.

32 thoughts on “Investing in Relationships for Growth

  1. I was totally bummed about not getting to FinCon too. I’m completely introverted, but I would love to push myself outside of my comfort zone and do a skype call! Great idea!

    • I’m a total introvert too. But I really love getting to know people. Mingling at a party is so painful, but I love the one on one conversation. Make sure you are on the email list, and I will send the info out Wednesday! I would love to get to chat with you beyond emails and comments!

  2. This is a very creative idea.!

    As an INTJ by Myers Briggs, I am always looking for new avenues to move that I more towards an E.

    With two working parents and two youngish kids, we understand the time issue. It seems like a large component of the blogging community is much younger or actually retired and that middle ground of parenting is much less populated. Or at least it seems so to us.

    One of the other bloggers in our area reached out to us to connect. So we’ll be doing that. Well actually, Mrs. PIE will be doing it as I am away on business. That time thing again…..

    • It’s so true. If we weren’t taking a year off, I never would have started blogging! With 5 kids 8 years old and younger, there is no way I could have made it happen. There are challenging seasons in life. I think it takes a fair amount of creativity to find ways to build those relationships. For us, getting away for 4 days, was too much. 10 minutes on Skype seems more doable. =)

    • Also an INTJ and also trying to push myself more towards E 🙂

      I love this idea. I have gotten very wistful and jealous reading all of the FinCon wrap-up posts today and would love opportunities to connect with other bloggers before next year’s FinCon!

      • Even though I am introverted, I love people. I love hearing peoples stories, connecting, and learning from others. It’s great to be able to do that at a conference. But there are so many other ways to! And for a lot of folks with little kids, or still working full time finding a few skype minutes seems more doable. In my email, I am going to send out a suggested script so bloggers can reach out to other bloggers and connect. I tried to come up with a whole google doc spreadsheet of sign up times, but figured I would keep it simple the first month! =)

    • I’m sending out the info in an email Wednesday! (Just make sure you get my emails) Feel free to dress in costume, but I also promise not to screen shot your face. =) I would love to connect with you more!

    • Awesome! I was bummed too, but am really excited about trying to build relationships and learning from each other all year long. After the meet and greet, maybe we can do monthly group chats! I have big ideas. =)

  3. Fun idea!

    I don’t know if you could have managed with all 5 kids but I definitely saw more than one family attending, including breastfeeding moms, and I loved it. PiC brought JuggerBaby so I didn’t miss them TOO much, for part of the time, and it was a LOT of fun introducing zir to my blog friends.

    I’m not sure if I can play on Skype for this round, I’ve been putting a few critical things on hold, but I hope it goes well and I can participate next time! (Oh heck, maybe I will try anyway!)

    • 10 minutes! I would love to connect for 10 minutes. =) This is how you know I am a mom of little kids: what amount of time is meaningful but doable? 10 minutes!

  4. Hey, Ms Montana. Lovely idea. Trying to talk Mrs. Groovy into it. Hopefully she’ll say yes. We just ran out of chocolate moonshine. But I’m sure we’ll wrangle together a rollicking libation if we’re able to participate. Cheers.

  5. FinCon is on the to-do list as well in the future, but we have a 15-month old and another on the way in April. Plus we just finished building our house, so conference travel is on hold for the near future.

    The Skype parties is a very unique idea that I’ve never heard of. I’ve heard of Twitter & Periscope parties. Great idea!

    • Yeah, it’s so hard with little kids! I might make FinCon 17, but in the meantime I still want to build relationships big conference or not. I am brainstorming how to do bigger group chats, but it would be great just to have a little meet and greet to say hi to folks! Hope you can find the 10 minutes. I know with a 15 month old, 10 minutes is about tops. =)

    • Oh no worries! My email sign up is on the right side of the screen, with a red button. I already sent the email, but I will resend it to everyone who signs up today and tomorrow. I hope we get to chat!

  6. Nice idea Mrs.Montana, Even I also missed Fincon and would love to join you guys for Skype party. Fincon was out of my reach as i couldn’t afford travelling all the way from here to there. As you said in the post, it is necessary and great idea to grow by building strong relationships with people around us. I hope this post would be helpful for all those who missed Fincon.

    Keep writing great stuff,

    Have a great day!

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